Confinement.. wat a scary word. Being pregnant is such a wonderful feeling esp when you add the freedom that comes with it. Child birth is such a torture. 1st, there is the painful labour with the pushing and tearing and than straight after that, the discomfort and occasional pain from the stitches and bleeding below. Now, when my breast starts to get engorged and feel like they are going to explode or when my milk ducts are clogged and i starts to get fever from Mastitis, i really wonder What's next?
I've read alot about it but when i experience all these myself, it can be so overwhelming esp when it come with the lack of sleep.i should be considered the lucky few already. with my darby helping with the house work and my mom helping with the baby in the day, I am indeed very very lucky :)..
Really wonder how those who dun live with their parent cope with all these.
I'm still adjusting to sleeping when the baby sleeps and expressing milk every 4 hourly. My baby now totally feeds on breatmilk but he still refuses to latch on cos when he was in the NICU he was already given the bottle :(. Actually this could be a blessing in disguise for me so my mom, sis and darby can help out with the feeding, and i can actually measure out the amt of milk that he consumes.
Baby Tristan is gaining alot of weight now and he has definitely grown longer. I have no time to weight him yet, will do so and update his length!
Now Abt confinement, My only complain is not being able to wash my hair and bath as often as i like and drink water as much as i want. Other than that, i'm eating well cos my mom makes yummy food for me but currently am overdosed with chicken already so will avoid chicken for a while after this mth! Luckily it's only 1 mth!!!! hee hee
Tristan's Albulm
The Growing Bb...
Current Weight: 10.3 kg (24 Jan 2011)
Current Length: 85 cm (24 Jan 2011)
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
50 Hour of Torture!
Fri 2nd Oct 2009
6.30 am- Menses- like contractions started. It was still barable. Woke up cos couldn't really sleep. Was wondering if to day was D-day.
8am- waiting for my sis to come back so that we can go and eat our favourite Teo noodles. After that, walked around interchange. contractions got stronger.
12 noon- mom made fried rice and i went to take a nap after that. now the contractions got stonger, about 20 mins apart so it is still early.
3pm- called darby cos constractoisn are now like 10- 15 mins apart n he said he'll come back home. Called Dr Lai also. Dr lai asked if i'm ok and said to go to the hospital if contractions are 3-5 mins apart.
4pm- darby came back, i could not sleep althgough the contractions were stronger that the once in the morning. tried to do some last min packing of the bags for hospital and the room so that it's ready for baby!
8pm- had a light dinner cos contractions were really getting stronger now and abt 5 mins aprt. But we wanted to make sure so decided to wait till it is more regular.
10 pm- decided to go to the hospital cos didn't want to wait till last min.
11pm- reached hospital and settled down but when the nurse checked me, was surprise to find that i'm only 1-2 cm dialated. Wah piangs!!!! a long night ahead man!!! :(
Sat 3rd Oct 2009- Mooncake Festival!
2am- Dr Lai came in to see me cos the nurses called him. I was actually surprise to see him so early in the morning. he checked me n said i was 1-2 cm dialated. he said he can try to 'stretch me' so that i could open more. although only 1-2 cm dialated but my cervics has thinned out so it's good. at least 1 thing is going smoothly. he said that with thing going at this speed, i might take a while to dialate fully n it could be more than 24 hrs. So Option A - to wait at the delivery suite, Option B - to go home 1st and wait or Options C - to wait in the more comfortable hospital room. I picked option A cos didn't wan to move around as the contractions are getting intensed but they are not regular.
4am- 8am- the contractions were getting really intensed now. at least every 1-2 mins, 1 major contraction. I try to relax and take long breath but it's making me wanting to vomit everytime i have contactions. my back and bum also ache like crazy.. This is when the rice sock and microwave oven comes in handy. you wouldn't believe it, it cost less that $15 to make 2 rice sock but what a differance it made to the relieve of pain. Without it, i could have died. darby massage me everytime my surges come in. we tried standing up but everytime i have surges, my legs will jus go weak!
8.30am- Dr lai came in to see me a 2nd time, He checked me again but i'm only 2 cm dialated, he said that my baby is the the OP position ( occiput posterior- baby is facing down but back of head is facing my back) which will cause intense pain especially on the lower back and bum area and a long labour! he asked me if i wanted to have pain relieve. Suddenly, the word 'pain relieve' sounds so magical to me esp after so much pain. But we decided to wait a little longer.
9.30am- i couldn't take it any more so told darby that i really needed to have the Pethedine jab. the nurses came in to give me the jab that could last up to 6 hrs. i was hoping by than, i would have dialated some more.
12pm- managed to fall asleep but the medication is already starting to ware off. i could feel the painful contractions come back :(
4pm- darby went back home to clean the house n feed animals. the nurses also brought the gym ball in so decided to sit on the gym ball and take a walk around the room. tried to do the 'polar bear' position, hoping to dis-engage baby and help him change position. walking aound actually should speed up the dialation but in my case, it doesn't help.
6pm- too painful so decided to take another shot of the Pethedine jab. managed to fall asleep after that cos was too exhausting already. I couldn't really eat although food was provided cos everytime i have surges, i feel like vomitting.
8pm- Dr lai came again to see me- this time, he ordered a ultra sound machine to be brought in. the ultra sound confirmed that baby is in OP position and i'm still only abt 3 cm dialated. He suggested that i use Protaglandin gel to help soften my cervics so to aid dialation. My goodness, after that, my contractions were more intensed and frequent. I wanted to have another jab cos it was so so painful, but the nurses told me to use the laughing gas instead cos too much Pethedine jad will make teh baby drowsy and no good for him, Bo bian n still very painful i used the gas throughout the night. How the gas works is that you need to breath in until the peak of the contraction and than stop using it. maybe it's the deep breathing, which helped a bit. I tried every position possible, standup, sitting on the gym ball rocking back and forth and walking around. That was pssibly the longest night ever for me!
Sun 4th Oct 2009- My Birthday!
7am- Dr Lai came in again to check me but i'm still only 2-3 cm dialated.. Haiz. we discussed augmentation methods.. he gave me a few options: Options A- burst the water bag and wait cos usally it might speed up labour. Option B- Burst water bag and use Oxytocin ( the hormones used to induced labour) to speed up labour which will be more effective than Option A. But if i decided to use Oxytocin, i shoud seriously consider the use of epidural cos the surges will be more intensed and frequent. Wah lau, after so many hours, the word 'more instensed and frequent' really frightened me man!
I went with option A 1st. So he burst my water bag. It was a strange feeling cos warm water started to gash out. He siad water is clear cos there is no sign of meconium ( baby's shit). Dr Lai said that he will leave the Option of using oxytocin and Epidural up to me and if i have decided to use it, i can jus let the nurses know and they will arrage every thing.
9.30 am- too painful! Decided to use Oxytocin and Epidural. So The nurses call in the anesthesiologist and he administed the IV and than the epdural catheter for me. I find the whole experience ok except the jab he gave me numb the skin painful. the epidural took abt 10 mins to work and after that, i totally knocked off man and jus slept through the surges although some of them, i could feel that i'm contracting but it was not painful.
12pm- I was running a fever becos of the epidural so now the nurses were monitoring the fetal heart rate and me more regularly.
8pm- One of the nurses checked me but i'm only abt 6 cam dialated. Was actually hoping to give birth to me today.
Mon 5th Oct 2009
12am- the nurse checked me and call Dr Lai. I'm still runnign a fever and the baby is showing some destress alreday cos of the drop in heart rate.
1.45am- Dr Lai came in, cheked me and told me that the situation is not too good cos there is thick meconium present so we need to give birth now. The nurses prepared and got everthing ready. when i told darby who jus woke up that i'm going to give birth now, he was so shocked. within 5-10 mins, everyone was ready, except me.
Dr Lai said he'll use the Kiwi suction cup to 'pull ' baby out while i try to push him out. We need to do it fast if not, we'll have to do a emergency c-section. that seriously got me motivated. The epidural was turned off so that i could feel the contractions and start pushing.
2am- still numb, i couldn't feel anything at all but whenever the nurses feel a contraction coming, they told me to hold my breath n push. I seriously dun know what i was pushing but i jus followed instruction. This whole 20 mins was tiring. Everytime i was told to push, i jus look at the mother mary picture on the wall infront of me and told her to give me the strength to push and i jus kept doing that. It felt like i was going to the toilet n was very constipated.
2.22am- Tristen was born! but before he had his 1st breath, Dr Lai suctioned out most of the meconium present in his mouth and nose and immediately, when he's born, darby was told to cut the cord and handed him to Dr Tan, the pediatrician. Dr Tan than suction the meconium present in his air ways. I took a 10 sec look at him and he was immediately wheeled of to the NICU. So much for skin to skin contact that i'm so craved for.. haiz :(
Dr lai stitched me up and told me that the perineum stretching that we were doing helped and i only tear a little. But at that point, i couldn't care much about how much i tear, i was exhausted, sore and very worried about my baby.
3.30am- i was wheeled to my room. I told darby to go look at our baby n give him some moral support. I'm not allowed to see him until the epidural wears off in abt 6 hrs time. Haiz...
I stayed in the hospital till fri 9th oct 2009 cos baby has to finish up his course of antibiaotics. 95% so to be on the safe side, we needs to finish his antibiotics.
It was tough for me. In a lot of ways i kept asking myslef if i would have done it differently? would i have opted for a c-section earlier when i know that he's in Op position so that baby would not have to go thru all these? or would i have opted to use augmentaion ealier so as to lesser my pain and that baby be born ok? In alot of ways, i'm glad that i decided to still have a vaginal birth instead of a c-section becos the recovery time is alot lesser and i can stand up and walk after 6hrs and visit the NICU regularly. but if i could change 1 thing, it would be to opt for augmentation ealier so taht he would not be in destress and born ok and we could have skin to skin contact and start breast feeding normally.
Well, I guess if i were to have another baby, i might not remember much of the 50 hrs of pain but i will do things very differently!
:D
6.30 am- Menses- like contractions started. It was still barable. Woke up cos couldn't really sleep. Was wondering if to day was D-day.
8am- waiting for my sis to come back so that we can go and eat our favourite Teo noodles. After that, walked around interchange. contractions got stronger.
12 noon- mom made fried rice and i went to take a nap after that. now the contractions got stonger, about 20 mins apart so it is still early.
3pm- called darby cos constractoisn are now like 10- 15 mins apart n he said he'll come back home. Called Dr Lai also. Dr lai asked if i'm ok and said to go to the hospital if contractions are 3-5 mins apart.
4pm- darby came back, i could not sleep althgough the contractions were stronger that the once in the morning. tried to do some last min packing of the bags for hospital and the room so that it's ready for baby!
8pm- had a light dinner cos contractions were really getting stronger now and abt 5 mins aprt. But we wanted to make sure so decided to wait till it is more regular.
10 pm- decided to go to the hospital cos didn't want to wait till last min.
11pm- reached hospital and settled down but when the nurse checked me, was surprise to find that i'm only 1-2 cm dialated. Wah piangs!!!! a long night ahead man!!! :(
Sat 3rd Oct 2009- Mooncake Festival!
2am- Dr Lai came in to see me cos the nurses called him. I was actually surprise to see him so early in the morning. he checked me n said i was 1-2 cm dialated. he said he can try to 'stretch me' so that i could open more. although only 1-2 cm dialated but my cervics has thinned out so it's good. at least 1 thing is going smoothly. he said that with thing going at this speed, i might take a while to dialate fully n it could be more than 24 hrs. So Option A - to wait at the delivery suite, Option B - to go home 1st and wait or Options C - to wait in the more comfortable hospital room. I picked option A cos didn't wan to move around as the contractions are getting intensed but they are not regular.
4am- 8am- the contractions were getting really intensed now. at least every 1-2 mins, 1 major contraction. I try to relax and take long breath but it's making me wanting to vomit everytime i have contactions. my back and bum also ache like crazy.. This is when the rice sock and microwave oven comes in handy. you wouldn't believe it, it cost less that $15 to make 2 rice sock but what a differance it made to the relieve of pain. Without it, i could have died. darby massage me everytime my surges come in. we tried standing up but everytime i have surges, my legs will jus go weak!
8.30am- Dr lai came in to see me a 2nd time, He checked me again but i'm only 2 cm dialated, he said that my baby is the the OP position ( occiput posterior- baby is facing down but back of head is facing my back) which will cause intense pain especially on the lower back and bum area and a long labour! he asked me if i wanted to have pain relieve. Suddenly, the word 'pain relieve' sounds so magical to me esp after so much pain. But we decided to wait a little longer.
9.30am- i couldn't take it any more so told darby that i really needed to have the Pethedine jab. the nurses came in to give me the jab that could last up to 6 hrs. i was hoping by than, i would have dialated some more.
12pm- managed to fall asleep but the medication is already starting to ware off. i could feel the painful contractions come back :(
4pm- darby went back home to clean the house n feed animals. the nurses also brought the gym ball in so decided to sit on the gym ball and take a walk around the room. tried to do the 'polar bear' position, hoping to dis-engage baby and help him change position. walking aound actually should speed up the dialation but in my case, it doesn't help.
6pm- too painful so decided to take another shot of the Pethedine jab. managed to fall asleep after that cos was too exhausting already. I couldn't really eat although food was provided cos everytime i have surges, i feel like vomitting.
8pm- Dr lai came again to see me- this time, he ordered a ultra sound machine to be brought in. the ultra sound confirmed that baby is in OP position and i'm still only abt 3 cm dialated. He suggested that i use Protaglandin gel to help soften my cervics so to aid dialation. My goodness, after that, my contractions were more intensed and frequent. I wanted to have another jab cos it was so so painful, but the nurses told me to use the laughing gas instead cos too much Pethedine jad will make teh baby drowsy and no good for him, Bo bian n still very painful i used the gas throughout the night. How the gas works is that you need to breath in until the peak of the contraction and than stop using it. maybe it's the deep breathing, which helped a bit. I tried every position possible, standup, sitting on the gym ball rocking back and forth and walking around. That was pssibly the longest night ever for me!
Sun 4th Oct 2009- My Birthday!
7am- Dr Lai came in again to check me but i'm still only 2-3 cm dialated.. Haiz. we discussed augmentation methods.. he gave me a few options: Options A- burst the water bag and wait cos usally it might speed up labour. Option B- Burst water bag and use Oxytocin ( the hormones used to induced labour) to speed up labour which will be more effective than Option A. But if i decided to use Oxytocin, i shoud seriously consider the use of epidural cos the surges will be more intensed and frequent. Wah lau, after so many hours, the word 'more instensed and frequent' really frightened me man!
I went with option A 1st. So he burst my water bag. It was a strange feeling cos warm water started to gash out. He siad water is clear cos there is no sign of meconium ( baby's shit). Dr Lai said that he will leave the Option of using oxytocin and Epidural up to me and if i have decided to use it, i can jus let the nurses know and they will arrage every thing.
9.30 am- too painful! Decided to use Oxytocin and Epidural. So The nurses call in the anesthesiologist and he administed the IV and than the epdural catheter for me. I find the whole experience ok except the jab he gave me numb the skin painful. the epidural took abt 10 mins to work and after that, i totally knocked off man and jus slept through the surges although some of them, i could feel that i'm contracting but it was not painful.
12pm- I was running a fever becos of the epidural so now the nurses were monitoring the fetal heart rate and me more regularly.
8pm- One of the nurses checked me but i'm only abt 6 cam dialated. Was actually hoping to give birth to me today.
Mon 5th Oct 2009
12am- the nurse checked me and call Dr Lai. I'm still runnign a fever and the baby is showing some destress alreday cos of the drop in heart rate.
1.45am- Dr Lai came in, cheked me and told me that the situation is not too good cos there is thick meconium present so we need to give birth now. The nurses prepared and got everthing ready. when i told darby who jus woke up that i'm going to give birth now, he was so shocked. within 5-10 mins, everyone was ready, except me.
Dr Lai said he'll use the Kiwi suction cup to 'pull ' baby out while i try to push him out. We need to do it fast if not, we'll have to do a emergency c-section. that seriously got me motivated. The epidural was turned off so that i could feel the contractions and start pushing.
2am- still numb, i couldn't feel anything at all but whenever the nurses feel a contraction coming, they told me to hold my breath n push. I seriously dun know what i was pushing but i jus followed instruction. This whole 20 mins was tiring. Everytime i was told to push, i jus look at the mother mary picture on the wall infront of me and told her to give me the strength to push and i jus kept doing that. It felt like i was going to the toilet n was very constipated.
2.22am- Tristen was born! but before he had his 1st breath, Dr Lai suctioned out most of the meconium present in his mouth and nose and immediately, when he's born, darby was told to cut the cord and handed him to Dr Tan, the pediatrician. Dr Tan than suction the meconium present in his air ways. I took a 10 sec look at him and he was immediately wheeled of to the NICU. So much for skin to skin contact that i'm so craved for.. haiz :(
Dr lai stitched me up and told me that the perineum stretching that we were doing helped and i only tear a little. But at that point, i couldn't care much about how much i tear, i was exhausted, sore and very worried about my baby.
3.30am- i was wheeled to my room. I told darby to go look at our baby n give him some moral support. I'm not allowed to see him until the epidural wears off in abt 6 hrs time. Haiz...
I stayed in the hospital till fri 9th oct 2009 cos baby has to finish up his course of antibiaotics. 95% so to be on the safe side, we needs to finish his antibiotics.
It was tough for me. In a lot of ways i kept asking myslef if i would have done it differently? would i have opted for a c-section earlier when i know that he's in Op position so that baby would not have to go thru all these? or would i have opted to use augmentaion ealier so as to lesser my pain and that baby be born ok? In alot of ways, i'm glad that i decided to still have a vaginal birth instead of a c-section becos the recovery time is alot lesser and i can stand up and walk after 6hrs and visit the NICU regularly. but if i could change 1 thing, it would be to opt for augmentation ealier so taht he would not be in destress and born ok and we could have skin to skin contact and start breast feeding normally.
Well, I guess if i were to have another baby, i might not remember much of the 50 hrs of pain but i will do things very differently!
:D
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Birth Plan vs God's Plan
Like going for some examination, i went to my delivery suite armed with 'the' perfect birth plan. Little did i know that God has the 'other plan' for me. LOL
As many of you know, my labour lasted abt 50 hours! YES! it's that long... and very very painful. I was prepared to go thru this birth easy, calm, relaxing and drug free but in the end, nothing in my birth plan came thru except that i didn't have a c-section.
Was it a waste of time than to plan so much as many people have asked me.... Well.. No! I was glad that by reading, researching and planing and doing all the necessary preparations, i had read up on all the possible procedures and medication, pain relief methods, induction and augmentation methods. So during my painful labour, i could make informed choices and know exactly was i was getting with each decision. I think in the end for me, that's what matters.
I'm glad that at the end of the day, my baby Tristan is safe and happy now. the period that he was in NICU was a big torture for me cos i had to go visit him whenever i can. Breastfeeding is difficult also cos he jus refuses to latch on. haiz...
Came back on fri and now still trying to adjust to life with him. It jus feels like having a new boyfriend n in a new relationship, very exciting, very happy but at the same time very nerve racking. LOL
I'm lucky that my mom is always around to help. She is jus amazing, cos without her, i dun even think i can cope or even Nap. Maybe only after being a mom myself, i started to appreciate the things she do for me although we still have our fights and disagreements. I guess it's jus like that for mom and daughter.
Having family around is great! My sis and Wangfei provides entertainment for my baby! It can be so funny sometimes, for those who have face book and can connect to my sis account, we 'put' the missing eyebrows on Tristan which we laugh until we couldn't stop..
Another person that i seem to take for granted is my darby, I must say that throughout my 50 hours of pain, without him constantly massaging me, encouraging me and loving me, i dun think i would have made it! As compared to me, my darby only had the small IKEA reclining chair to sleep on and he had to shutter between home and hospital everyday. What he had done for me and Tristan is jus beyond what i had expected or could have expect out of anybody.
It strange, i though that i might suffer from post natal depression but i can tell you now that i feel really great everyday! except that i get teary often.. hee hee
Tristan has put on weight since he came home.. Started at 2.69kg at birth, today he weights 3.12kg at 1 week!
Sorry picts all over the place, cos uploading it with my darby's comp and without photoshop... :P
Friday, October 2, 2009
Home run- FINALLY!!!
It could be today, tomorrow or sun.... I think... Been having menses like contractions lately, esp last night and i can see spotting.. Could be my mucus plug releasing. :PDarby had been really busy these few weeks, coming home really late, trying to finish up his work so that he can also go into 1 mth confinement! LOL. But yesterday he told my son that he can finally come out anytime now. It was a relieve. I was excited and at the same time scared. So now can only wait. :D
I'm all prepared and the rest is up to the lord... Pray for me! hee hee
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